Even though it seemed like the perfect match in the beginning, somewhere along the way you’ve realized that this is not the supervisor for you. Now what? A break-up? At first glance, it may seem as simple as finding a new supervisor and terminating with your current one. And although it is logistically that simple, there is a lot that you might learn about yourself if you are willing to explore why the relationship isn’t working especially if you explore it with your supervisor. This may impact how you deal with all of your relationships that aren’t working, or don’t work from time to time.

Often times when a supervisor isn’t a “match” for us it’s because they are triggering our own feelings of inadequacy with regard to being a good therapist. So before you dump your supervisor, pay attention to what emotions are being provoked. Are those emotions something you can work on to repair the relationship?

Whether you switch or not, this increased awareness will only enhance your relationship with your current supervisor or your next one. The supervision relationship in many ways is like all of our other relationships in that our issues will surface along the way. And what better venue to look at them? And again, this is not to say you shouldn’t get another supervisor, it’s just to notice what your role might be in the relationship not working. As I’ve heard said “the best thing you can do to be a better therapist is your own work”, and any relationship that’s not working is a great opportunity for us to engage in that work.

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